Dear Spider:

Dear spider that I killed:

I am very, very sorry I had to brutally murder you by smashing a book into your body three times. You were a brown color, small, had long legs, and you were sitting on a small irregular web. I apologize for jumping to the conclusion that you were a brown recluse spider.

 If you were a brown recluse spider, you should already have known that punishment for being in the vicinity of my children is instant death.

If you WEREN'T a brown recluse spider I am very sorry you died for no reason. :( I will take any and all blame.

Sincerely,

I don't usually judge a book by it's color but you were the WRONG color, in the WRONG-shaped web in the WRONG place at the WRONG time.

<3 br="">